Thinking big and wanting a lot for ourselves is something most of us have not learned. Instead we think in terms of getting just enough to get by--at best. What I want for people worldwide is to want a lot more for themselves and to think a lot bigger. Evidence shows that in direct proportion that we raise the bar for what we want and why we want it, we enhance our ability to gain clarity, take action, and effortlessly achieve even more than we wanted.

Here are some steps that I have used for myself and dozens of clients in my coaching practice that created many a dream come true. Try these ten steps and begin to make your dreams come true starting right now.

1. Create a clear and compelling vision--something you care deeply about rather than something you feel you should care about (A vision is what you see).
2. Have a burning desire to realize your vision. The desire must be much bigger than the obstacles.
3. Develop a compelling "why" you want to achieve this. This will be the heat that fuels your vision and will evolve into your mission. (A mission is what you do that contributes to the realization of your vision)
4. Create a reserve of support. Get more support than you think you need and before you need it. Stay away from people who will shoot you down.
5. Make your commitment HUGE. Develop a "NO Plan B" mentality to realize your vision. This will give you the ability to breakdown your vision into bite size pieces and take immediate action.
6. Strengthen your personal foundation. The bigger the vision the stronger the foundation must be. Eliminate all sources of negative energy, distractions and things you are putting up with. Identify your unmet needs and get on a campaign to get them met. A personal need is something you must have met to function at your best.
7. Identify your core values. Your values are extremely important to you and an expression of who you are. This will make it easier for you to define your purpose (like your values, your purpose is who you are).
8. Make friends with fear and move forward anyway.
9. Define who you need to be when you realize your vision. Be that person NOW!
10. Be present and enjoy the process. Being in the present is where you experience breakthroughs and having fun will bring you a lot of lightness and create a delightful adventure.

Copyright Chrissy Carew 1999.

The higher our standards, the better our life is. Standards are the actions and behaviors we hold ourselves to. When we raise and honor high standards we feel very good about ourselves and it increases our ability to attract high quality people and opportunities.

When we raise our standards, our personal foundation gets stronger, we feel a lot happier, we are more focused, more productive and life seems to get a whole lot easier. Try these steps on for size and with each new standard you raise make sure you celebrate!

1. Identify and write down everything that is draining your energy.
2. Start eliminating the easiest "energy drainers" first.
3. Get more support than you think you need regardless of your situation.
4. Look at all the options - delegate it, dump it or do it yourself.
5. Make your commitment huge and take full responsibility in raising your standards high enough so the "energy drainers" don't reappear.
6. Create a compelling vision of what you want your outcome to be as a result of raising each standard.
7. Take a look at the cost of not raising the standard.
8. Put the structure in place to support each standard.
9. Reward yourself every time you raise a standard.
10. Create an action plan to eliminate what's draining you and give your self more time than you need.

Copyright Chrissy Carew 1999.

Transition is a big part of life and most of us have not been given the tools to move through it gracefully. One thing for sure is that we are all much more than our transitional situation. Every transition bears gifts, new insights and a whole new way of knowing ourselves. Once we get on the path to expanding our ability to know ourselves with more depth we become more accepting of who we are. This naturally evokes more compassion within for ourselves as well as for others.

You can look forward to new gifts that arise that you didn't know you had, familiar gifts growing bigger and the quality of your life can be much more than you expect.

It is always best to create a vision of where you want to be once you get on the other side of the transition.

Focus on the light, acknowledge the darkness and give yourself permission to practice extra kindness on yourself exactly where you are right now.

Anticipate the grace ahead!

1. Get more support than you think you need regardless of your "transitional" situation.
2. Take a look at what you can let go of and simplify your life as best you can.
3. Be gentle with yourself and give yourself permission to slow down and/or take a temporary time out.
4. Acknowledge any resistance to change.
5. Find ways to add lightness to your heart.
6. Develop a "No Plan B" attitude toward nourishing yourself and commit to creating some delicious daily habits.
7. Discover ways to turn this transition into an adventure.
8. Keep a journal and record your feelings and allow yourself to feel it all.
9. Under-promise and over-deliver and count to 10 before saying yes to anyone.
10. Make adjustments in your life to allow the transitional process to take priority.

Copyright Chrissy Carew 1999.

Authentic confidence is an attitude and a skill that can be learned. It is built on the foundation of who we are vs. what we do. It is our birthright to believe in ourselves and to continue to develop the confidence to live the life we have always imagined.

Even the most confident people in the world temporarily lose confidence when they stretch out of their comfort zone. They stay true to themselves in the midst of low confidence and understand that it is part of the on-going process for continuous growth. When we allow ourselves to actually surrender to not being confident, we then discover a strong building block towards realizing authentic confidence.

Here are some steps to assist you in building authentic confidence:

1. Surround yourself with people that believe in you...exactly where you are...right now. Get more support than you think you need regardless of your situation.
2. Look at any feelings of incompetence from a new perspective. It can be empowering when we can accept what is and actually become "confident about our areas of incompetence" (without self-judgement). We can begin this process when we lighten our hearts, focus on our strengths and acknowledge that we can't excel at everything or be all things to all people.
3. Identify specific areas of your life where you want to build more confidence as well as the obstacles in the way. Make it a priority to strengthen those areas and start with the easiest place first. Create a strategy for removing the obstacles and make sure that your internal motivation is much bigger than the obstacles. Inside every obstacle lives an opportunity for tremendous growth, knowledge and wisdom.
4. Create a series of small victories and celebrate each one using the concepts from step 3. You will build momentum while increasing your courage to take action and succeed.
5. Reach out to and learn from people who are where you want to be and find out how they got there.
6. Monitor your self-talk and replace negative thoughts with positive affirmations.
7. Make it a priority to learn more about the things that fascinate you. Fascination is usually an indication of a calling...go ahead, take action...and answer the call.
8. Remember to stay true to what you value most and focus on your strengths.
9. Learn from your mistakes in the moment so you don't have to repeat them again in the future.
   
10. Identify negative assumptions that are holding you back and replace them with empowering beliefs.

Getting more organized and getting rid of clutter are goals that many people strive for in every area of life. It is no wonder that we all need support with this because of how fast things are changing, the technological advances and the complexities of our lives.

Being organized and clutter-free will simplify and enhance the quality of your life. Here are some steps to assist you in developing your organizational skills.

Here are some steps to assist you in building authentic confidence:

1. Identify all the areas of your life that could use an organizational tune-up. Examples include your home, your car, your office and/or your finances.
2. Create a compelling vision of what your desired outcome will be. Focusing on what you are moving toward rather that what you are moving away from will give you energy and increase your desire to see it through.
3. Identify the benefits of reaching that vision. This will be the fuel that heats your vision.
4. Estimate how much time that it will take you to reach your organizational goals...now double it or better yet triple it! Give yourself much more time than you think you need.
5. Select the easiest area to dig into and get to work. If you selected your home, you could start with cleaning out one closet or even one drawer. Getting complete in one small area will give you a tremendous sense of accomplishment and naturally inspire you to tackle the next item/project.
6. Raise a new standard that will keep you organized and put the structure in place to support you.
7. Get more support than you think you need regardless of your situation. Options include: hire someone to do it for you, hire a coach, and/or empower family members, friends or colleagues to assist you in reaching your organizational goals. Make this a team effort whenever possible.
8. Create a plan with built-in rewards for each milestone you reach.
9. Give the things you use every day top billing for easy accessibility. Take the things you seldom use out of the mainstream of your environment. Tuck away dateable information and set it up in an archive with expiration dates. Toss the things you haven't used in a year.
10. Celebrate and bask in your organizational accomplishments.

Copyright Chrissy Carew 2000

Procrastination is something we all put up with and is one of the most common blocks to success. There are many reasons why we procrastinate such as too much to do, not enough support, trying to do it all yourself, lack of interest, lack of commitment, trying to be perfect etc.

One strategy does not fit all for overcoming procrastination. We are all wired differently therefore, there are several alternatives to try on before choosing the right strategy for you.

Here are some steps that you can look at to support you in eliminating procrastination...once and for all.

1. Ask yourself...Why am I such a fabulous procrastinator? What is my unique process for being so brilliant at procrastination?
2. Create a formula that supports your process for procrastination. Pressure + dread + overwhelm = procrastination or unfocused + uncommitted + confusion = procrastination.
3. Take a look at where you are not procrastinating in your life and identify the key elements of your success.
4. Create a success formula--examples: Compelling Vision + Focus + Commitment = Success Desire + Baby Steps + Consistency = Success Priority + Support + Reward = Success.
5. Once you have identified your success formula apply it to what you are procrastinating.
6. Make a decision and a declaration to do it, delegate it or dump it.
7. Get excited about your desired outcome. Focus on what you are moving towards rather that what you are moving away from.
8. Create a reward for each milestone you reach.
9. Become accountable to someone else. Ask them to support you in completing this project.
10. Under-promise and Over-deliver--give yourself double the time you need with everything and under-promise the completion date. Start with the easy things first.

Copyright Chrissy Carew 1999

Time is something most of us wish we had a lot more of and we try very, very hard to manage it. Time management is an oxymoron. We can't manage time but we can manage ourselves. There is a huge discrepancy between what needs to get done and the time allotted to do it.

If you say you want more time what you really want is more space. Here are some steps to support you in creating the space to make the most of your time with the ultimate goal of having more than you need.

1. Notice where you are spending your time now. Start by actually recording and tracking it for two weeks. It can be a real eye opener when you see it on paper.
2. Make a list of your top priorities and goals. If you are not willing to put them in writing then you are probably not ready to see them through.
3. Once you have tracked where your time is spent, see if it matches up to your top priorities. This will be a wonderful "reality" check.
4. If your top priorities are not the focus of your time spent, then take a look at letting go of your lower priority tasks. Get support, delegate and put lower priority task on the back burner or eliminate them all together.
5. Under-promise--give yourself more time than you think you need with everything. Allow for distractions, life interruptions and interference.
6. Set up a time line for all tasks using the under-promise model. Break your goals down into bite-size pieces. Get specific and write out what you are going to focus on each day, each week and each month. Make sure your time line is realistic--we often think we can do things quicker than we really can.
7. Remove the debris in the way of utilizing your time. Identify what you have been procrastinating and include these items in your time line. Start with knocking off the easiest ones first. This will create an enormous amount of space for you to put your top priorities onto solid ground and into the forefront of your life.
8. Test your time line and be open to change your strategy. If it isn't working, perhaps you are not committed, you have signed up for too much or it is time to delegate more or let go of even more tasks in your life.
9. Become accountable to someone, either a friend a colleague, family member or a professional coach. Be specific on what you are being accountable for.
10. Put the structure in place and raise the standards to keep you on top of your precious time.

Copyright Chrissy Carew 1999

Truth comes from the heart and it takes patience and practice to develop the skill of delivering the truth with grace. However, the truth is not useful if it is not constructive. Telling the truth from a place of love gives you the ability to be unconditionally constructive and honorable.

It is essential to be truthful to ourselves. When you set the standard to always tell the truth you easily gain the trusts of others and yourself. The stronger your personal foundation the easier it will be to tell the truth. It is very important to make sure that it is safe for you to tell the truth.

Here are some tips on why you would want to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth no matter what!

1. Being true to yourself and true to those around you will make your life a whole lot easier.
2. The sooner you tell the truth the easier it is.
3. The longer we hold back the truth, the harder it is on others and ourselves.
4. When we tell the truth our relationships grow stronger and richer. When we hold back the truth our relationships suffer including our relationship with ourselves.
5. Telling the truth creates freedom and lightness. Holding back the truth creates excess baggage. The more we hold back the more baggage we have.
6. When we tell the truth we are blessed with intimacy. When we hold back the truth we feel alone and separated.
7. Telling the truth increases our ability to be happy. Withholding the truth can cause numbness, apathy, anger and sadness.
8. When we tell the truth we become trustworthy. When we hold back the truth people don't trust us. All relationships are built on trust.
9. When you tell the truth it becomes easier to reach your goals. When you withhold the truth reaching your goals is a lot harder.
10. When you tell the truth you attract people who also tell the truth. When you hold back the truth you attract needy people that drain you.

Copyright Chrissy Carew 1999

To always tell the truth is a wonderful thing to strive for. However, the truth is not useful if it is not constructive. Our perception of truth is unique to each of us and it evolves and changes shape as we grow. It is very important to make sure that it is safe for you to tell the truth

Telling the whole truth is a skill that can be developed and it does take time. Give yourself permission to build this muscle at your own speed. Taking small and consistent truth-telling steps will have a dramatic impact on the quality of your life. The greatest place to start with telling the whole truth is with yourself.

Here are some tips to support you in raising your truth-telling IQ.

1. Learn how to Respond vs. React. We respond with love; we react with fear. We respond in the present and we react with constraints to the past or fear of the future. All breakthroughs happen in the present.
2. Pay attention to signs from your mind, body, and heart when you don't tell the truth. Place extra emphasis on your heart because that's where the truth lives.
3. Tell the truth quickly the same way you pull off a Band-Aid or get into cold water.
4. Take a look back at a lesson you learned or challenges you have now because you didn't tell the truth. This will increase your desire to tell the truth now.
5. Get a partner to practice telling the whole truth with. Get more support than you think you need.
6. Get to the core of the truth. If you have a lot of "shoulds" in your vocabulary then chances are good you are not speaking or connecting with your truth.
7. Don't tell the truth when you are very angry because you might say things that you will regret. After you cool down, it may not be the truth any longer.
8. Deliver the truth with a loving and compassionate tone. It is okay to use a compassionate edge.
9. Be gentle with yourself and give yourself time to develop this skill. Start with the easy stuff first.
10. Be open to seeing where you may have blind spots to your truth.

Copyright Chrissy Carew 1999

The common thread that runs through the most successful people in the history of mankind is that they all realized they couldn't do it alone. Reaching out for support is a brilliant quality they all shared and something that we, too, would do very well to adopt. In fact, what we want to aim for is to have more support than we think we need.

Hands down, people who have a lot of support not only reach their goals quicker and with more gusto but they also experience more fulfillment and have more fun getting there.

Creating a reserve of support is a wonderful way to enhance your relationships and experience the intimacy of a fabulous community. In addition, you will create more space, learn quicker and you will become a fabulous model for your children and all those around you.

Here are some tips to assist you in building a strong support team:

1. Take a look back at your life where you had the greatest success. Chances are good you had support. Examine the support system you had in place and think about how you created it. Now, look at how you can use this as a model for building a support network today.
2. Get together with family members and clearly identify all the areas where you could use support and enlist them on the spot. Empower family members to contribute to the discussion and potential solutions. The more committed you are, the greater your capacity will be to engage others who actually get excited about chipping in.
3. Get together with friends and together explore options for receiving more support. Find out what kind of support they have in place and see what strategies you may want to adopt. Also, become each other's support coach so you can keep the momentum going.
4. Check out various support groups locally and on the Internet. Examples include Parent Groups, Women in Business, Toastmasters, Guilds, Church, Chambers of Commerce, etc.
5. Become accountable to others while you build your support team (friends, family members, colleagues, support groups). Letting others know what you are doing is a catalyst for success. This is a great place to enlist the support of a professional coach.
6. When people offer their help, say, "YES!" Allow them to have the privilege of contributing to you.
7. Reach out to people in your community who already have a lot of support. Ask them to support you now and share how they built their support network.
8. Honor your relationship with yourself and carve out one a day week where the only person you say yes to is you! This is a healthy habit to adopt to refuel, revitalize and rejuvenate while adding sparkle to your life.
9. Use the support of your voice mail or answering machine to capture all calls. Make it easy for people to connect with you.
10. Under-promise and over-deliver with all commitments. Give yourself much more time than you think you need for everything. A conservative guideline is to give your self at least twice as much time as you think you need for absolutely everything!

Copyright Chrissy Carew 2000